The Spirit Carries On!!!

What if i die today?
Will anyone care about my existence?
What if i die today?
Will anyone noticed my absence?
What if i die today?
Will anyone shed a single tear?

Have you ever asked urself such questions before? Well, i asked this questions all the time too. It's not that i have the model answers for you, but i certainly have thot about it and can offer my point of view to the questions.

The way i attempt to answer these questions was to really sit down and analyse the questions carefully. And i sort of realised 2 main points that surfaced from them. 1stly, the uncertainty of death which raised questions like where will i go after i die. 2ndly, does the world even give a hack about my death. There are hence two way to attempt to answer the questions:
1) Atheistic way
2) Theistic way

For Pple who believe that there's no God.
Basically, for this group of pple, the point on wot's there for u in ur afterlife is not valid anymore. Since you do not believe that there's a God, basically the beginning and ending of life isn't as impt as living the life itself.

Like Samurai who dun believe in God, this pple dun really bother about what is death. They merely care about how they die. They focus more on the 2nd point(does the world even give a hack about my death) more than the 1st point( wot is death and where do i go after death). Samurai live their whole life as a quest to search for an honorable end. They believe that death of the most honorable way, is the most beautiful thing in life. Therefore, they develop a series of code of conducts (bushido) in which a samurai should live so as to achieve an honorable end. The famous seppuku(self-disbowelment) aka Hara kiri was developed.

Maeda no Toshiie in the show Toshiie and Matsu once said, "we can only live a lifetime, but our names can live on for many lifetimes" Death to him wasn't as impt as what those who live beyond his death think of him and so on. However, i really wonder when one died, will he even know that pple remember him? Hmmm....

For those who believe that there is God.
Pple who believe in God (including myself) will have a deeper meaning in living life and facing death or afterlife. As a Christian, I believe in eternal life which comes due to the redemption of Christ death on the cross and His resurrection which reconcile us with the almighty God. Therefore, i already possesed the answer regarding the uncertainty of death, for death is not the end, but only a transition from a lasting life to eternality.

As for the 2nd point, it doesn't matter anymore whether anybody care about my absence or not. Becos I have embarked into a new journey of afterdeath (not afterlife) already, and for those who haven't, life moves on and they have to carry on to fulfil their purpose in their life. They have to work up their salvation for those who believe in Christ and carry on to live their eternal life which started at the point of their dedication of faith to JC. Hence, i would encourage them to go on to live their lives and not be too affected by my death.

These are my personnal views on the questions...Hee, sorry har...Got nothing to do at nite, so just blog abit lor....Before i end, below is the lyric of a song by my favourite band. Hope you'll like it.

Song: The spirit carries on
Album: Metropolis 2000 live scene from New York
Music by Dream Theater
Lyrics by John Petrucci

Nicholas:
Where did we come from?
Why are we here?
Where do we go when we die?
What lies beyond
And what lay before?
Is anything certain in life?

They say, "Life is too short,"
"The here and the now"
And "You're only given one shot"
But could there be more,
Have I lived before,
Or could this be all that we've got?

If I die tomorrowI'd be allright
Because I believe
That after we're goneT
he spirit carries on

I used to be frightened of dying
I used to think death was the end
But that was beforeI'm not scared anymore
I know that my soul will transcend
I may never find all the answersI
may never understand why
I may never prove
What I know to be true
But I know that I still have to try

If I die tomorrowI'd be allright
Because I believe
That after we're gone
The spirit carries on

Victoria:
"Move on, be brave
Don't weep at my graveBecause I am no longer here
But please never let
Your memory of me disappear"

Life's full of crabs!!!

Downed with Flu this weekend. Dunno wot went wrong leh!!! But was knocked out since i came back from Gym with Sindric on saturday evening. Actually i was feeling abit weird liao, but got the full effect maybe after i exerted myself physically.

Crabby dinner!!!
Was invited by Pat for dinner over at his place with FR male stinters (Haiks, Dan and Man). Pat cooked chilli crab and Jac cooked Veg and clams. Wow man!!! It was delicious!!! The gravvy for the chili crab was great!!! Just nice, not too sweet, not too sour and the taste of ginger really spice up the whole thing. Ohh man...This dinner will cost about 40 to 50 dollars if we eat out. The clams were great too!!! I like seafood alot, especially eating shellfood!!! Dinno that Pat has such a hidden talent!!! Wondering wot other giftings he possesses.

Was having fun with Kyrie before the dinner and she came to me and said:" I like you, uncle zp"...Ohh man!!! So sweet!!! Haha!!!It makes my dinner tasted extra sweet that evening. But amidst our dinner, Kyrie met with an accident when she fell. Her left ear got bruised quite badly...so poor thing!!! She cried badly!!! However, a while later she began jumping around again. Thank God she's ok!!!

After dinner and ice-cream, we have a time of sharing in Pat's study room. Dan and Man shared about their feelings about support raising and we have some heart to heart tok too. Then Haiks shared with us the song he wrote which i dun remember the title. Sounded very good and i like it very much. Dun play play ok!!!!Haiks is multi-talented ok!!!

Then when we about to leave, I requested tat we do a recording of the song Masquerade. Dan on vocal, Pat and Man on percussion and me on guitar and vocal. Dan was good...he smoothened the melody once again and the song masquerade was completed. Now it's awaiting the arrangement by Manson and of course, the final recording which all the other songs are waiting for.

Gymming my way to be the next HHH
Sindric brought me to CDAN gym which we had some work out. It was a long time since i have ever gymed. Started with my triceps and i did a couple of sets. Cool!!! Feeling my muscles tightening abit liao. I used to be quite skinny in the past especial during my late teens but when i saw HHH on WWE...Inspired to have a built like him...So i ate alot to gain the mass and trained awhile but stopped eversince i entered NUS. Anyway, the gym was cozy and suprisingly empty. Oh ya, it was a saturday evening, and tat's y it's empty lah. Who will go gym on a saturday nite!!! Only single man like us!!!haha.

Sunday Service at True Grace Pres
Wasn't feeling well on sunday morning!!! Still flu-ing and hence, i decided to attend True grace Pres which is somewhere near my place. Met an old fren Weiyan whom i din meet for quite long since he came back from UK earlier this year. Was glad to see him serving actively in church again eversince his broke-up with his ex (his churchmate who was also someone i respected as a senior back in my Poly CVCF days. Her behaviours and actions really stumbled me as she left him for a non-christian whom she claimed to have a "love at 1st sight" with. Nonsensical!!! How can she gave up her 5 years relationship with weiyan becos of something that we all dun believe in(love at 1st sight)!!!). Weiyan is now a "laoshi" liao as younger youths ran pass us and greeted him laoshi!!! Cool!!! But sadly, i din see his ex around anymore in the church.

Met with Jiajun. We used to play in a band together called the pursuer( a chinese rock Christian band) whom he's the bassist and i was the Eguitarist. Ohh man...he's ballooning in size man!!!Getting rounder and rounder!!! Bixia was standing beside him and i almost cant see her at all. haha!!! Glad to hear that he's into property now... Chatted with both of them before they departed for lunch.

Met jiaye, Mingyao laoshi and wife....met Rev Wang ping who is still so bubbly and youthful after so many years. Met alot of old friends that day!!!

Went back home after service to rest again...Took medication and it knock me out for the rest of the afternoon. Woke up and went to Sun plaza to do some groceries.

Strolling with Him
Was doing my prayer walk last nite despite still sneezing my life away. Had a great time of chatting with Him. I was telling Him that even though i am really not smart, not wise, not talented, not gifted enuf, unable to do many things, am a jerk, an idiot....but if i were given a chance in my life to make a wise decision....I will choose to walk the path He has prepared for me.

Was also telling Him about my dream of seeing Ezra's room making it big in music industry and is able to do big things for Him....But these are just my dream, a foolish shortsighted dream....He has already a plan craved out for us liao. I am willing to journey that path that He has prepared. Taking each step by faith, just like walking on water!!!! O Lord, be with me!!!

Ezra's Room update
Daniel's support is up to 50% liao!!! Good work bang!!! So proud of you... Manson's still left 600 dollar to raise monthly. Big bang is having his presentation on monday afternoon. All the best man!!! Song Masquerade was completed and awaiting full recording.

That's all folks!!!!

3 more weeks to Holiday!!!

Slept early last nite and woke up in a cool overcast morning. Felt like sleeping again and again all the times. It's not that i am tired, but just feeling lazy lar....I am quite sick of getting up so early in the morning at 6am liao....Somehow i really dun like to wake up in darkness when the sun is not up yet....in fact i really hate it...It's like i dun get to see the board day light of my house....Leave home before the sun rise, reach home after the sun set.....So sianz!!!

3 more weeks of working life left.
Ohh man, 6 mths are really short. Time flies as my intership in MSD is coming to an end. There will be alot of things that i will miss here in MSD.
1) My cozy workstation with alot of food, cute stuffs,pictures of close pple in my lives and Bible verses.
2) The friendly staffs here. Pple like Ishak, Yueh ling, Jasmin, Joanne, Cheryl, Andrew, Muja, Limin, ah Keo, Angela, Huishan, BB and more.....
3) The after office hour life i got to enjoy!!! Cool!!! Leaving my life the way i want it....loadsa guitaring...
4) My bangs will shout that i will definately miss the pretty gals in MSD....Ok lah ok....I'll miss them ok!!!! But too bad, din get any of their contacts.....haha....So sorry bangs, cannot introduce to u....haha
5) The most impt thing i will miss, is of cos, the pay lah!!!Haha...i have saved some money for my driving test liao....

However, there's somethings that i cant wait to get out of in this company.
1) Some unfriendly and mean pple...
2) The food here....I think the caterer here sucks....The food is really underpar compare to other caterer i have tried. Also, the very rude and unfriendly cashier make it worse...I am glad i'll be out soon
3) The extremely boring Data entry job i have....The amount of data keep piling up like a mountain now...and it's still piling up. Arghhh.....
4) Travelling to Tuas to work....Tua's really far and hotter too. Even the water taste funny here.

Brother back from Wallaby
My younger brother came back from Wallaby(Australia) last nite after completing his exercise with his company. Darker and fitter, he came back home with loads of stuffs he bought...wonder he got buy anything for me or not...hee!!!

Guitar practise
Last nite i broke away from my usual practise regime and only jammed with songs. I jammed over Maroon 5's tracks and told myself that i need to be musical rather than technical. And thanks God, i quite like the stuffs i came out with last nite....Using some muted diatonic licks, exploring appegios( in a slower speed), also i forced myself to handicap the used of bending....it's cool when i discovered load of new ways of attacking the notes!!!!

Pack up my room
My room is now in a mess yet again....have to pack up some of the stuffs i brought back from work place. Hmm, want to set up a corner in my room that is more conducive to my guitar practises session...Also, i will be giving lessons to some boys too...must set it up real soon.

Ezra's Room update
Alvin took "story of a girl - You should know" and edited some parts of the lyrics andthe title of the song. It's now known as "Story of a girl - Masquerade". The song turned out better liao....and it's growing on me too....Cant wait to listen to how manson and daniel will want to arrange the song.

I have some ideas of writing a song that is groovy. I have been listening to Maroon 5's Friday the 13 live CD and really enjoy the grooves of the band...Really nice...this is one of the few album this days that i really enjoy. Maybe Ezra's Room can sit down to look into the writing.

I am also planning for a prayer session for the band with Sara...so that we can sit down and pray for the band.

Dream Theatre Live!!!
Yeah, Thanks to Melvyn, we have booked the tics for DT live in Singapore, 28th Jan 2006 8pm.
Melvyn, Pat, Haiks, Manson and I will be rocked my arguably one of the greatest Band ever alive!!! Yeah!!!


That's all for now!!!

Song about a Girl!!!

Last nite was an eventful nite for Void as we had our appreciation plus thankgiving dinner. The food was marvelous as Voiders and spouse and friends of Voiders get together for an enjoyable time of sharing and crapping. hee!!!

VOID's Dinner
Ohh man, the food're really great!!! I like the asam fish very much....the fish was very fresh!!!! I like Dotz's Chicken too....it's good when she kept the garlic level low!!! I like the nancho's with cheese and meat made by P'sharon's mum...Ohh man!!! Very good!!!!

Last but not least, i love Sara's desert....Strawberry on pancake? (is this wot u call it) It's very very tasty....Was thinking that Sara and Carl can go and set up a desert business upon their retirement...hee!!!

Beside the food, we have a time of appreciation for each members. I just want to thank them all again....you guys are among the best, the most talented i have ever worked with...and i am so proud to be a Voider because of you!!!! The only regret was that Don and Engie was unable to join us last nite. But we did a recording of our appreciation to them last nite.

HSA audit
Ohh sharks, my office is like a war field right now becos of the audit check. Everybody was rushing to do last minute preparation and correction for the audit. It made it all looks so wayang!!! I thot i only can see wayang in Army, but No!!!! it happened in my work place too.

Ohh come on, regulations are placed to ensure and aid the company to achieve efficient and safe way to produce their product. If you dun obey it on normal days, but "wayang" when audit comes, it makes all the audit seems so meaningless!!!

Ezra's room Updates
Last evening before we departed from GCTC for Void's dinner, manson and i wrote a melody. Yes!!! Yet another song. We have almost 8 original completed songs liao. Working hard on more.
This morning when i woke up, while travelling to work, i wrote down the lyric inspired by a female friend of mine. Here's the song:

New Song
This song is about a girl who is nursing wounds of a failed relationship. On the front she has to act strong and somehow not affected by the pain caused by those wounds. Putting on a mask, she went out to face the world including him. However, each time she saw him, the healing wounds were tear opened again, giving her fresh hurt especially when both of them were engaged in a foolish competition of "who can get over who 1st". The mask that she's wearing to hide her broken self seems to concave inwards when he treated her like an invisible object.

Story about a girl - Masquerade

(Verse)
Masquerade, to be someone but me
Lost today, like the fool i've come to be
Can't evade, but to play this game
Try to win, but i'm wounded the same

(Pre-chorus)
You should know, how hard it is
To move on, in my insanity
You should know, my world is caving in and i can't hold on!!

(Chorus)
Each time you turned away, i cried
Be strong and not lose faith, i tried
Take off my masquerade, tonight
Battled and all alone, i'll cry

(Bridge)
All alone....., i'll cry

Legend:* Silent - ed


Daniel and Manson will be doing the demo for this song and i am glad that Manson wants to take up the to lead the arrangement of the song. Like the bangsters will know that i am kinda stuck with some particular way i arrange music. It's perhaps time i take a retreat to add in new musical ideas in my repertoire.

We did some photo shoots the other day and we have some cool pics of the band. Hope to post it up soon.

Driving

Finally got to drive a car after so long. I used to drive land rover "illegally" in Army, hence i wasn't very sua gu about driving car. My instructor Mr Ng is quite a good teacher and he corrected many of my bad habits, like my hand postures on the steering wheel. Remembering to signal when turning was tough for me too cos back in Army, there wasn't any traffic in the Outfield, so it's ok not to signal. Will be taking lesson with Mr Ng regularly from now.

That's all folks, i have to go fight war at work liao!!!

It's still my Life, wot's new??

It's yet another rainy morning and the weather was freezing. Woke up right on time and remembered to bring the Bday cake that i was tasked to buy. We will be celebrating the Belated Bday of a colleague Mujar'ah later in the afternoon.

Ezra's Room update
The bangsters met up last evening to do some photo shoots to send to someone in her giftpack. And we had some very cool pix....haha!!!Maybe can use them as our album cover.

We went to Holland V for dinner. All of us ordered Char Kway Teow...Super large plate. The aunty was very nice, she asked us whether we want extra large portion without increasing the price. Of cos lah!!! haha...

We forgotten to ask the aunty not to add beansprout in Man's plate and it would have almost killed him but thank God that we spotted in time.

Dinno that Dan dun eat clams....Big bang was suan-ing him that Char kway teow is not Char kway teow without clams....

We are still working on the song "Love U"....I had an idea this morning to write something about "Walkin the talk"...Had a riff in my head when i was listening to one of Incubus' song. Wanted this song to be angsty 1, so i have in mind a minorish progression and perhaps can add some low E-string muted punching sound with my Ibanez. The chorus will burst with energy...Ohh man, cant wait to get my hands on my guitar to try it out.

A family car
My dad and my rich younger brother were toking about getting a family car for about quite sometime liao. I think it will be almost certain for us to get 1 if i can get my license soon. Wow!!! Having a car means i can drive down to GCTC and not take the super infrequent 200....yeah!!!

Void's thanksgiving
Ohh man, cant wait for wednesday Void thankgiving dinner at p'sha's place. Cant wait to taste Sara's cheese cake again... Speaking of her cheese cake, the last time i brought a box home and left in the fridge for less than 2 days(while i was staying over in GC), my dad finished 3/4 box of it...Wow lao...Sianz....So now i dun care liao, want to have my share of the tasty cheese cake all for myself!!!

So sad that drummer Don cannot join us for the dinner. He's away in Korea!!!

Watching Dream theatre "live"
Melvin and I have decided to catch this amazing band live in Spore indoor stadium this coming January. We are getting 90dollars ticket. Allrite man, can finally watch my favourite band perform and of cos, watching my guitar hero John Petrucci live in person.

Dat's currently it for this edition of "It's my life, It's Alive"..... :>

Random Rand

It's a rainy morning again as i tiredly drag myself to work, carrying my super heavy POD with me. Nothing unusually special happened in my life for the past few days and also, nothing exciting was going on too. I enjoyed good times of rest and indulged in guitar playing again. Can't wait till Big Bang finishes his exam and we can write songs again. I have af ew melody lines waiting for his lyrics.

Ezra's Room
Ohh man, i miss jamming with Ezra's room. Now that Big bang is having exam, Dan and man are support raising, we have put our jamming aside. I hope to resume jamming after big bang's exam. No updates from Dan and Man about their support lately. I am hoping for good news from them. By the way, i was listening to our songs indemnify lately, my love for this song just grow and grow...Really like this song very much and hope to place this song as our hit in our 1st album in times to come...hee!!!

That Guy
By God's grace, i was chatting with that guy again on MSN. Well, guess wot, i think we have misconceptions of each other and really thank God that we thrashed things out that nite and cleared alot of misunderstanding. After all, i think that he's actually quite a nice person, he may be abit blunt and not careful with his words, but i think his act of writing the email has change my impression of him as being arrogant.

Latino heat
I am still unable to accept the fact that latino heat is no more. He died so suddenly which makes me realised how fragile life is. We can die from all sort of causes and reasons....we can even die without a reason!!! But thank God that for us who believe in JC, death is not the end, but only a transition towards a promised eternal life without pain and suffering. Goodbye my wrestling hero!!! Hope to wrestle you in heaven and apply the figure-four leg lock on you haha!!! And surely that you cant cheat like you always did in WWE!!!

Walking with Jesus
My mind was quite empty lately...All the difficult issues that i have been trying so hard to sort, seems to be giving me a break. I did my prayer walk and all i prayed for, is for other bro and sis and to tell Him that how much i enjoy strolling with Him. Everynite about 9.30pm, i will have a little stroll with God around the empty field downstair of my house.

Lately the breeze was amazing, praying as i walk, the breeze just brushed across my cheek, stirred up my hair. Maybe becos my block is near the ship yard that the breeze smells like seabreeze...U guys shld come and smell it urself....So cool!!!

MSD work
My work has been piling up lately, as the new campaign of tablet testing is starting soon. Hell man...I spent the whole of yesterday printing and preparing forms for the technicians to fill up. Tired man.... But knowing that i have 3 weeks left in the company, i am feeling a bit cant bear to leave. "No no...bangs...I know u guys are thinking that i cant bear to leave the pretty gal that i took photo with rite?...I noe u guys will definately think that way!! WWWWWW...6 x Whatever to you bangs!!!haha!!!"


Well, that's all for now!!!

The Passing of our brother

The world of wrestling saddened by the demise of Eddie Guerrero’s passing. He passed away on Sunday morning 13 Nov in Minneapolis at the age of 38. He was found dead in his hotel room. Eddie was a great wrestler and an interesting character to watch in WWE show. He won the title 2 years back after many many years in this entertainment business and without a doubt, he was my childhood hero. Although WWE portrayed him as a cheat, a stealer and a liar who would do all things to get the title, but actually he is a christian in real life who is strong in faith and influenced many WWE superstar offstage.

Here's an interview with Chris Jericho, one of eddies' closest friend in the business. (source: http://www.wwe.com/inside/news/Y2JremembersEddie)

Chris wrote that: " .....I’m not worried for Eddie because he was a man of God and I know he’s in Heaven. I just feel really bad for his family, and I selfishly feel bad for myself. I love Eddie, he was my brother on the road....", "He was just a really cool guy. He had a real strong faith and belief in God, too. He was never afraid to talk about it, but he would never push it on anyone. He was a true family man and most importantly a warrior for God. He taught me so much about wrestling and about being a man and it is an honor to call him a true brother and friend."

Pls carry on to pray for Eddie's family, his wife Vickie and daughters Shaul, 14, Sherilyn, 9, and Kaylie Marie, 3. Eddie Guerrero's funeral will take place on Wednesday, November 16 in Phoenix, Arizona and it will not be open to the public as requested by Eddie's wife Vickie, even after speculation that it should be open to the public. "Superstar" Billy Graham will be performing the service.

Guitar Freak, I am!!! Blinddates, I will not!!! -Maeda

Had a great weekend of resting and slacking. It was those rare weekends that i can have it for myself. So i spent it all doing the things that i have longed wanted to do. I reaaranged my room abit by moving my bed sideway against the wall and my created my little workstation area with my com table and study table joined together. Of course, my jamming area where my amp, POD and my wife laid. The miraculous part is that, it still looks very spacious. Enjoying every corner of my room now (especially my bed).

Practise Items
Basically spent my whole saturday sleeping. I woke up around noon time. Slacked abit before engaging in my practise regime for the day. Before i started, i listed out what are the items to practise on, and i actually came out with an interesting item. I called it the handicap drill when jamming with a song. I classed it into several categories:

1) Stings handicap - meaning that i can only play certain strings or dun play certain strings, so it will build my overall usage of the scale in horizontal aspect. Also technically, i have to develop my skip string technique which i will like in to develop into skip string shredding and appegiating.

2) Position handicap - meaning that i can only play certain position or dun play certain position of the fretboard with respect to the caged system. While improvising, there is always a position or two that i called it the safe zones whereby i will hit them when i am not "venturing". This drill will help me expand my scope and hoping to make the entire fretboard my safezone.

3) Notes handicap - Gosh!! This is the meanest and toughest aspect of the drill. Notes handicap meaning that i can onli play certain notes or not play certain notes at all. This requires quite understanding of where the notes are at once, without relative references. I must know what notes i'll be hitting next. Actually, this drill was intro-ed to me by Steve Vai in GT megazine where he wrote that having this handicap, will help me develop more ways in attacking the same 3 notes that i am playing. Exciting. I tried it a few times, and i sort of
realised that I have to pour in every single technique that i know already!!!

4) Technique handicap - As u may all noe already that technique handicap meaning that i am not allow to use certain techniques in my soloing. I realised that i used alot of bending and alternate picking for shredding. So if i applied handicap on this 2 techniques, i have to sub them with something else. Maybe i will use sliding instead of bending, legatos instead of alternate picking. This will help me to use the techniques that i seldom use.

Just to share with you all my fellow guitarists!!!

Blinddate???
Just as i was happily practising my guitar in my room, my dad invited his frends from the taxi fellowship over. Apparently, they will be having some sort of Xmas celebration programme where they have to present some songs bah. I stayed in my room while they were buzy practising until my dad came in and said that he wanted to introduce someone to me. I thot must be some uncles that want to see how i look like lah, so i went out to entertain him lor.

Then do my most "dunno wot adjectives to describe my feeling lah...." surprise, he intro-ed me to a girl!!! Arghhhh!!! Ganna con-ed.... Apparently, she is the daughter of one of the uncle from the fellowship and came over to my house to help the band. So awkwardly, we chatted lah. Interestingly, she's also from NUS, same year as me but she is doing psychology. She's attending a chinese anglican church and is serving in a para-church organisation VCF....Lotsa similarities har.... My dad told me that she played drum and keyboard in church...Well, good for her lor....Feeling abit overwhelmed by the amount of informations liao, so i sneak in an advertisement for TURT2006, and explained to her what was it about briefly and invite her to come for audition lor....Great!!! their next round of practise began and that's my opportunity to sneak back into my room again. Relieved!!!

In my room, i was thinking to myself, " Siala, wot's the old man trying to do...never warn me beforehand and put me in such situation." I know my dad is concern about me, becos all my cousins of the same age, is either attached or planning for marriage. 1 of them is getting married next month, and of cos, even my younger brother is attached. But dun have to be overly concerned lah. He tot that i haven't got over Elyn(my ex) yet, and i know he's worried. Ohh man, come on lah!!!

What do i think about the girl?
I think that she's really a nice girl. At least she's a good daughter that is willing to help her dad even in her exam period, while i dun even bother about asking wot my dad is doing...haha!!! I find her quite cute, slim and bear a very bright and nice smile.... "Hey hey, hold on a minute bangs, i noe my ah bangs are calling me slimy again rite!!! Minibang must be screaming for me to go whack lah, or else intro to him....haha...."...."No ...no, i cannot intro u, if i intro u, today u come 2ml i closed down!!!(haha, Russel peters) ha ha ha"..... But the sad truth is, i dunno her background...dunno what type of person she is, dunno what direction she is heading....blahblahblah....Sigh!!! Getting a partner in life is so so so troublesome. Unlike getting a guitar, u will noe u love her at the 1st strum....haha.

I think it all seems too troublesome for me liao. But regardless what, i dun really bother much lah. I think i am really satisfied with my life as being single now lah. Can get to do the things i like and has a burden for. Cant really fit in somebody in my life yet...But, i will still carry on to pray for the someone. Let not pressure from other pple to affect me lor.

Service in SAC
Went to SAC for service on sunday. Ohh man, i cant relate to the sermon at all again!!! At least 7/10 sermon in SAC were like that. The topics were either on Parenting, Grand-parenting, coping with aging and stuffs like that....Ohh man!!! I understand the fact that the church has a diverse age-groups of pple and we are from different walks and stages of lives. I tried my best to absorb as much as i could, but the sermon was very very very elderly-directed. Maybe i will find it useful 40years down the road, but i think i will likely to forget every single bit of it liao by then. I felt so unfed at times....Tat's y i often sneak to CEFC. Ok ok!!! I am not comparing churches, but i believe that CEFC also has very diverse age groups but yet the msg that Pastor edmund and team bring across every weeks were as good as always impactful and i could bring home and apply!!! Sad!!!

I cant wait till the new QPP service starts where Pastor Loo and Pastor Ling will be heading. I really enjoy learning from their sermon which i certainly find more able to relate to.

By the way, the new QPP extension is almost done. I sneaked to have a look liao, and the place is really really really cool!!!!Wow!!!Very very nice leh, building-wise!!! The new hall is also very big and spacious!!!So cool!!! Already dreaming that Ezra-room can do a gig or so there!!!Cool!!!


Watching David tao's concert
Ivan told me that he'll be watching David tao's live in Singapore concert on 26th november. On the same evening, a sister was asking me whether i will be interested to replace her to go for the concert as she dun really listen to him. Hmmmm...I dun dislike David tao, and i find him incredibly talented(come on, 7 days covered alot of his songs ok, dun play play)...Come to think of it, if i really want to listen to his songs, i might as well listen to 7 days....free some more!!!heehee...i very cheapo hor!!! Anyway, i will be saving money to watch my dream band performing in Singapore after the new year. Dream theatre is coming....John Petrucci is coming!!!My guitar hero leh...dun play play!!! That will be money well spent bah, i rather!!!

G3 live in Tokyo is out in Store now
Thanks to Lun, i remembered that G3 live in Tokyo DVD which featured John Petr, Steve Vai and Joe Satch is out in store already....Cant wait to get my hands on it!!!Exciting!!!

Also to Ah lun, sorry for not taking you seriously at times!!! Sorry pal, just my own defensive mechanism at work again!!! Once bitten twice shy!!!

That's all Folks!!! Loony tune!!!

Was watching Russell Peter's stand up comedy last night for the 2nd time. This guy is really really super duper funny. Oh man!!! He made me last non-stop with some of his joke...But what i like best, isn't his racist remarks or dirty jokes, but is the way he potray the Chinese and Indian pple with their essence. So funny. I like the part when he was talking about buying a bag in a chinese store...Or man...Super duper funny....Also the part when he pretended to be a chinese comedian and said:" hey hey, excuse me....You mother is so Faaat!!!..........Daaaaaaat when she jump for Joooooooooy........SheGotStuck!!!....Thank You!!!" haha...Super lame and super funny.

His apology
Actually i din expect the guy(i will call him by this in my blog) i tok about who has hurt me with his blunt remarks to read my blog...Actually i din even remember giving my blog add to him. He replied me with an email of apology when i logon to my hotmail early this morning. I really appreciate it alot and accept all his apologies as i believe that God is has answered my prayer for reconcilation with him. I think it's really Him working and planning for all this to happen. In my email to him, beside telling him how grateful i am that he actually replied me thru email, i shared with him that how my mistake scan be turned around my God to become blessings in disguise.

I made a mistake for not remembering the fact that i actually did give him my blog address. I made a mistake in believing that my blog is where i write all my feelings and thots on and noone will read except some of my close pple in life. But God changed it all around. The guy told me that he wouldn't have realised that he has hurt me if not for my blog and he wouldn't have apologied. I appreciate his apology very much.

He told me that he din recall saying those things about my playing sucks and stuffs....In fact he actually dun believe that he ever did despite the fact that it was so vivid in my head dat he did. If not, why would i be so upset about? Why would i even to feel all this turmoil in my heart hearing that i am gog to uni meta again? Anyway, with the benefit of doubts, i chose to believe that maybe he said all this jokingly and he din mean to hurt. So as a brother in Christ, speaking to him out of love that he should be careful with what he say lor...He admitted his straightforward and blunt nature which i think it's perfectly fine to be( it could be attributes), and i accept him as who he is. But sometime when a strength is not used properly, it may become ur weak point too.

And he went on in his email in sharing with me his opinions about serving God with one heart and not to take into heart what pple said. I fully agree with him and want to thank him for sharing. I guess, growing from a Xian background, playing in church and stuffs...I have never come across criticisms that are so blunt and personnal. I have never learnt how to handle them when they came flying at my face. Was smsing Pat about the whole Saga and Pat wrote: "pple will say wot they wanna say lor, So why worry about things that are out of my control?" Yes!!! I think i just have to focus on serving God and playing to the audience of One - God!!!

I am so glad that God has stepped in to help me resolve so much before i go on to lead Void in the meta gig. Now i can really focus on it liao. I am also glad for God's work of reconcilation... Hmm...maybe God can help me reconcile with my ex-gf whom i have hurt so much...so that we can be brother and sister again....Wait a second!!! Better be careful of what i amd praying for!!!

That's all folks

Void season extended yet again

Sara talked to me last nite in the midst of my set up for Void rehearsal. She asked me whether i could take over as Void band leader for yet another Void gig in University Metamorphosis camp because p'Sharon will be assigned to take up leadership role in Love acapalla. I thot to myself why not? becos this is a chance when i can learn more about being in leadership in a FR band so that i can contribute in a greater extent in Ezra's Room band. I also see it as an opportunity to develop myself further before i come into FR as staff.

As Mr "Can" man, i agreed and quickly rushed off to proceed with setting up.

Forgiving the guy who hurt me
While rehearsing, i was going through in my head about leading the band in Uni meta. Then i recalled that something very hurtful to me occurred on last year meta when i took part as one of the worship bands guitarist. We have several worship band that took turns to lead worship. Our band led the worship for the 1st nite and the guitarist from the other band actually came to me and commented that my playing sucks. It cuts me like a knife and i was almost shattered. Admitting that due to the fact that the band i was in was made up of amature players, and the fact that we were very loose, but he shouldn't come up to me to say such things. Knowing that i wished to join TURT2005, he commented that:" haiya, let me tell u, if i go for audition, u definately will not get in one....but u are fortunate, i will be buzy for that period, so maybe u might still have a chance." Wow lao!!! How could he say such words... Is he really that good? I frankly think that no lor...Even though that he thinks he's good, he shouldn't have come to put down and criticise other pple who is trying to serve God.

His words really ringed in my head for a long time. I almost wanted to find chance to lash it back at him, but Pat told me that I should not. Focus on sorting out myself with God, and let God deals with him. I must learn to love him as a brother even though he has hurt me badly.

Anyway, I realised the fact that i will likely to see him when Void perform at Uni meta this 28th december, my nerves started to tense again. i asked myself that:"wot would he say to me this time?" The anxiety starts to kick in. Oh no... i mustn't lose my cool, because i am leading the band. sigh!!! As i was writting this blog, my heart was heavy!!!

Was sharing this with Sindric and Donovan on our way home after Void rehearsal. I was very bothered by the anxiety and could not hold it further so i shared with them the whole story. I am sorry that by hearing this story, they became angry too. Sorry folks!!!

But i think it was all God's plan, becos on sunday, when i was attending worship at CEFC, God convicted me that i should forgive him and forget all the hurtful stuffs that he has said to me. I agreed to God, and now i could see God setting up the stage for me to do so.

I also think that with this issue going on, it will make my leading Void band, more challenging as i have to exercise letting go my personnal anxiety and worries to God and focus on directing the band. I prayed to God that i am willing to take up the challenge, just be with me!!! Let whatever comes it may be!!! whatever hurtful things that he'll say again.

Ezra's room band news
I went early to GC yesterday and witness Dotz learning to drum. Oh man...this gal really pick up things very fast leh...i think maybe becos of the fact that her rythemic sense is very strong (something that i have observed from Void). Then i heard that she actually expressed interest in playing for Ezra's room band knowing that the band is looking for drummer. Hmmm...I think it will be cool to have a female drummer in our band...We need some yin to offset the yangs...haha!!! And i think Dotz is an incredible personality to work with too...Will be very exciting working with her. However, considering the stuffs the band is doing, our genre may require quite high level of drumming capabilities.

Then i was reminded that in our band, we have different level of musical capabilities. We all starts somewhere and we'll keep on growing. Pastor Edmund said that it is the responsibility of a leader to realise the potential of his people....and i think that this girl got potential even though that she may not be ready to join us in our 1st season, but given time, she can be and will be!!! Bearing in mind that this band is a permanent thing!!! I just want to tell her that: " Dotz, keep your heart of serving in Ezra's room burning ok, i believe you will make it and i will be waiting for u to join us....Practise hard ok!!!"

Our big bang Alvin suffered a set-back for his 1st paper on tuesday. He's quite affected by it and i hope that he can focus on the rest of the papers. Jiayou Bang!!!!

Good news, Daniel and Manson both received a one time gift offering from Boon yong our 7days leader. Thank You Boon yong!!! Daniel and Manson, pls carry on to jiayou, hope the gifts from boon can serve as a morale booster!!!!

P'Si and his Djembe
Ohh man, i felt so sad for p'Si whose Djembe skin was ripped open. Noone knows how it happened, but he was very upset as he tot that it can be another sound that 7days can have. P'Si, dun be sad, for God sees ur heart!!! :> Cheer up ok!!!

Jason and his new wife
Void's bassist jason has gotten a new wife....a spectre bass...6 strings somemore....Sum one want to play like john Myung har....Maybe i shld get a 7 strings and start playing like John petrucci...and FR can have a new Dream theatre styled band!!!Haha...Congrat brother jason!!!

Pray for Jeff
Our brother jeff met with an accident when he was driving down for our practise last nite. He escaped unhurt...thank God....But his sister's BMW was badly hurt....Pls pray for "healing" for the BMW...hee!!!

That's all folks.....

This is my life, i'm not trying to hide, just trying to indemnify!!!

Woke up in the morning feeling extremely tired. I slept through the whole journey to work...Slept on the train and on the bus, i din even remember how i staggered my way from my home to the MRT station. Thank God that i did not meet with any accident and somehow made it thru, safely to work.

1 mth left in MSD
5 mths have passed like wind blows since i 1st stepped into the company. I have enjoyable times and of course unhappy times here. One of the most enjoyable time that i had, was the slack times i had which i used it to study about Music theory. It was really fruitful as i finally understood the key concepts of modes, chord construction, chord substitutions and of course the art of practise scheduling. I compiled a big files on these from the internet. Then all the pay days were very exciting too. But sadly, most of my pay were used to pay my debt which i borrowed from my rich brother to pay my tuition fees. I loaned some money to a close friend of mine. The rest of the money was used to buy a mp3 player, a new bag, POD from melvin and of course, my wife AT200. I think these were money well spent.

I used the POD for FR gigs for Override and VOID. And i will be using my AT200 for the new band(which i like to call it Ezra's Room... The name Sanguine i agree isn't catchy enough ). My MP3 player whas served me faithfully as it's the equipment that we used to record our songs. Songs like Found, indemnify etc, were recorded using it. The only regret i made is to buy the hush puppy bag becos it's too small and it's has a magnetic clip on to ledge on the flip. The magnet is no good for my electronic equipments like my MP3 and Handphone. Sad.

Sold my old guitars
A man must be faithful to one single wife. I strongly agree with that and so, i am selling away my 2 old wives...haha..No lah!!! I am selling them away because i find it hard to maintain 3 guitars, therefore i selling the other 2 to pple who will treasure and use them. I have just sold Alvin my Black Goth Epiphone for quite a low price. The reason why i chose to sell him is because i believe in the chinese saying of "furtile water shalt not flow to other pple's farm." haha!!! I told him that selling him at low price is an act of support for him going on staff with Forerunner.
PS: Sorry bang, can't support u much even though i really wish to.

My korean SD Squire will be sold to my student in SAC. Also at a low price!!!

I hope that the sale of two guitar can generate some money for me to take up driving.

Taking up driving
I have finally made up my mine to take up driving liao. Remember the good old army days when i used to race those old land rovers with my frens...And of cos, driving huge tanks like Bionix, SM1 and bronco. Those were fun. The reason why i din take the test earlier because of money issues and lack of motivation to learn. I was saving money for my own degree course in University. Now that i may have some extra cash plus money i borrowed from my officer brother, i can take up driving liao...Yes yes...Hopefully i can get my loan to my close friend back soon...( 1 K plus) so that i can pay back to my brother. So a total of 2 K i think is enough for me bah.

Another motivation why i took up driving is also that my family is considering getting a Kangoo, and so i can used it if i have a license to drive. And perhaps i can used it for FR gigs when we have to transport stuffs and "staffs" from GCTC to concert venues. Even without the kangoo, i can also help to drive the FR van for our new band gigs. Because we cant always rely on Sara, Haiks and Sharon to drive it.

New band stuffs
I am so proud of manson that tis lad has raised up to 60% liao...Not easy man!!! Proud of you minibang... I want to encourage daniel further..." Bang, hang in there...and helping u sending ur newsletters to my friends liao...hopefully can arrange a time with u to meet with my friends. Just want you to know that we are here for you, not infront of u, not behind u....but rite beside u ok!!!" Alvin is having his exams this week...Think today 1st paper!!!So i better dun disturb him!! Hang in there big bang!!!

Ohh, by the way, we came out with a few names for our bands during a meeting with Sara. Some names were really funny like: simply bento, pork chop, auntie yummy....even kyrie's band(named after Princess Kyrie.....She's so cute!!!!Ooops...dun digest!!!) But some names are cool like: "Ezra's Room, Stir, Sanguine heurisko and x-square....Finding a name is really not easy because this name will stick with us for a long long time.....

Over the weekend, Alvin and I came out with 2 more songs: Shattered walkways and another untitled song. We have fine tuned and completed "Once again". The next step is to wait for big bang to finish exam, and we can carry on to write some more. Also of course, daniel and manson to raise completely so that we can kick off the new band by doing recordings. Yeah!!!Jiayou!!!

"Companion in life" again
Someone was asking me about what type of gal i liked....hmmm.....Well, of cos i do like a certain type of gal, but i think there's no criteria non-negotiatable. I remember p'Jan was telling me that how p'Puu wasn't his type in the beginning when they met....But God helpped them to fallin love and now to p"jan, p'Puu is all his type.... I think i must correct myself lah...Yes, there is a certain type of gal that appeal to me more than the other type...but i am looking in to the heart of the person more than whether she's the type or not.

There are some non-negotiable criterias though:
1) She must be a X-ian
2) She must be God-centred and love God...
3) Of course, we must have same direction in live lor...

Previously i was secretly admiring a sister for 2 years leh....I felt like a wimp for not have the courage to tell her that...Anyway, She's very God-centred but i realised that her direction in life is very different with mine...so i din carry on....It took me quite some time for me to "kill" my feelings for her.

So last nite, i telling God that i am keeping a open heart with who He's bringing to me. I dun care what type of gal she is...As long as He wants me to love her, i will love her selflessly.... :>

Prayer Requests
1) Pls pray for the new band that I am involved in with FR. Pray that Dan and Man can raised support fully soon and for Alvin to be able to focus on his exam. Pray that i place their interest over the interest of the band.
2) Pray for my health bah....recently i am feeling quite weak....fall sick easily especially with Flu...
3) Pray for Joshua's recovery( simon's eldest son who has undergo an ear surgery). He's making fine progress.
4) Pray for my mentor Pat who is raising support also. Pray that He can carry on to rely on God who has been the provider of his life for the past years
5) Pray for myself to be able to live out the PDA life.
6) Pray for me to have idea and motivation to do my final report for my IA
7) Pray for my driving lor!!!

HeeHee, tat's all folks!!!

Living a PDA lifestyle

Today i attended service at Covenant EFC and listen to my favourite preacher Pastor Edmund Chan spoke. He spoke about 3 impt principles of love that is described on Roman 13:8-10 :




1) The permanence of Love
Toks about love as an on-going obligation. Love is not a feeling, but an act of the will.

2) The primacy of Love
The greatest commandment that is stated in the bible, is to love...So love fulfills the law.

3) The practise of Love
Love is an action word

Actually, what really spoke to me, was the call to lead a PDA life. What is PDA life?
(P for Personnal revival, D for Divine appointment, A for Active Obedient. ) PDA lifestyle is to me, a lifestyle which see a person walking closely to God, be sensitive to His will, and be obedient and submissive to do His will.

I was having my mentoring session with Pat(my mentor) on saturday at Bras basah Foodcourt eating the best best Bah Chor Mee in town. I was sharing with him that how difficult it is for me to balance or if not, letting my passion for God's work be more than my passion of music. Then Pat wanted me to change my perspective, my way of looking at things. He said that having the passion for music is a good thing. As a musician, playing music is definately the one of most exciting things in life, i dun have to suppress it at all. He told me that being a Christian musician is not about juggling the passion for music and God all the time.

Then he reminded me about what pastor Edmund has introduced to me in IDMC 2005, living the PDA lifestyle. Living a PDA lifestyle starts with personnal revival. When i looked back on myself, Yes!!! I indeed has some personnal revival in my life. Each night of prayer walk, i will pray that i can be drawn closer to closer to God...My QT becomes more meaningful and the urge to seek God becomes more intensified. There is this revival in the Spirit in my life now.

Up next is Divine appointment. I need to ask God for the ability to discern which is His divine appointment that He has planned for me. Alot of time, we heard the Lord's prompting for us to perhaps go and help a brother in crisis, but we always find excuses for ourselves not to do so by telling Him that we are doing something more important. Maybe practising guitar for up-coming gigs as something more impt than helping a brother with his ministry work. On the other hand, helping others too much and neglecting our own family or ministry that God has made us stewards of, is also not the way. Pastor Edmund shared about since young, God has taught him to give....and he really find the joy in giving...it came to a point where by God has to stopped him. God spoke to Him and said: " Son, did you ask me first about giving?" Basically, not all situations that we encountered are divine appointments...We need to be able to discern which is.

The last carriage of the train is Active Obedient. This is i think, the most difficult part in the whole life style. When facing rehearsing for gig and the divine appointment that God has made for me to share gospel with perhaps someone i met on the train, which is more impt? Knowing God's will is for me to put aside my "self discipline practise regime" to spend a night or so to share gospel with someone i don't know, am i willing to obey Him. Pastor Edmund spoke of Pastor Tony's example. Ps Tony met this couple at the end of a prayer meeting, and saw the lady crying. At first he thought it was a tiff between the couple but he realised that the distance cousin from HongKong of the lady has passed away. Because the cousin do not have a church membership in Singapore, the lady actually asked Ps Tony whether CEFC could conduct the funeral. At this point, Ps Tony realised that this could be a divine appointment set up for Him. He actively obeyed and asked the couple whether they could make their way down to Singapore Casket immediately to discuss the funneral arrangement. He also called to make arrangements for other pastors to help him took over his pastoral duty in church for the weekend.

He was at the funneral discussing the arrangement and he found out that there were alot of non-christian relatives which includes the husband of the deceased. So, at the wake, he shared the gospel. During the Altar call, He asked whether anyone wished to receive Christ as his/her personal saviour, there was an awkward silence... then he began to ask God that:" Maybe he has made a fool of himself again..." But then, miracles happened, hands began to raise up including the husband and the daughter of the deceased. Amen!!! Pastor Tony obeyed God's divine appointment and God used him to save 11 souls that evening. He was lost in the awe of God.

So living a PDA life to me means that, doing what God told me to do at the moment. Whatever is it practising my guitar, or helping a granny cross the road, if i can identify it as a divine appointment, i will actively obey. Now the main thing for me to do is, to pray for personnal revival and discernment to know which is His divine appointments.

I think this is a very impt lesson learnt to live my christian life. Whatever i do, i hope that it's all according to God's will. Hope this will bless those who read this blog.

Our Songs

All our songs lyrics are below:

Indemnify

written on Oct 31st

[Verse 1]
was 16, and life's a trash
Was 18, wish i could crash
juz crash and burn so i could walk away from it all

Insignificance, sums up my life
my acceptance, i'm trying to find
when all i know juz fades away like dusk to dawn


[pre-chorus]

such a life out of line
not one i'm trying to find

[Chorus]
this is my life, i'm not trying to hide
this is my life, juz trying to indemnify
this is my life, if i could turn away
this is my life, but i can't turn back time....


Copyrights Reserved @ 2005
Bang Productions
Forerunner Music Ministry

Found

I’ve been wandering so long
Thru these cold winding lanes
Just trying to find my way
To a street that bears my name

My battered soul cries for release
From all this hurt and pain
Frustration running thru my veins…


Though I walk thru the valleys of death,
I fear no evil for You are by my side,
You restore my soul,
My spirit is renewed,
And I’ll dwell in Your house forever.

You are my Rock, my fortress,
My strength,
help in time of need.
And I’ll follow you wherever you go,
Just hold my hand and never leave me,
My Saviour, my God, my King.


When I was down you came and found me,
Set me up on my own feet,
My guiding with darkness around me,
In your arms I want to be..



Copyrights Reserved @ 2005
Bang Productions
Forerunner Music Ministry

I want to know

written on 18th Oct 2005

[V1]
days are grey, since you're gone
what's left are just memories
looking back, i can see your face
it still feels like yesterday


[Pre-C]
if i could turn back the hands of time...
if i could only make you mine...


[Chorus]
I want to know, are you there for me
will you cry for me
when my days are done
Hold my hand, never let me go
So that i will know
that you care
i want to know...

[V2]
Walking home, a day has passed
fighting memories hoping they will last
look around, i'm all alone
the days we've had have all fade away...


Copyrights Reserved @ 2005
Bang Productions
Forerunner Music Ministry


Void

written on 15th Oct 2005

[V1]
you're wondering, you're thinking
of countless words that you could begin
of freedom, of reason
a million thoughts 'bout where you belong

[Chorus]
i need to stand up from this fall
this life can offer so much more
i need a reason to believe this world hasn't end it all
i know that there's someone out there
Someone to hold me, bring me, to the place i belong


[V2]
it can't be, it's ending,
It's over before i could think of it...
What life is.....so empty,
A void that's all-consuming me



Copyrights Reserved @ 2005
Bang Productions
Forerunner Music Ministry

Again

- written on 31st Oct
- revised on 3rd Nov (altered verse and pre-chorus)


[Verse]

I have journeyed all these while
thru bitter tears and the blessed smiles
shattered dreams and broken reveries
living for the moment i'm called to be


[Pre-Chorus]

Even if I lose strength to fly
Can You make things feel alright


[Chorus]
Walking away from the storm and the rain
Wanna feel you inside my arms once again
Feels like i'm awake to my hurt, and the pain
Just wanna feel you inside my arms once again




[Ending]
Walking away from the storm and the rain
Wanna feel you inside my arms once again
Feels like i am saved from the hurt and the pain
When I feel you inside my arms once again...
When I feel you inside my arms once again...
When I feel you inside my arms once again

Psalm 137 and Indemnify

It's a rainy morning again, felt like hiding under my thick blanket for the rest of the day but couldn't. Have to drag myself off to work. A sister in Christ sent me a SMS of a verse that she thought was very applicable to my ministry in Forerunner. So i went on and read it.

Psalm 137:5-6
5 If I forget you, O Jerusalem, let my right hand forget its skill upon the harp.
6 May my tongue stick to the roof of my mouth if I fail to remember you, if I don't make Jerusalem my highest joy.

This verse was familiar to me as i recalled Chuck Hong(founder of stream of praise) once wrote a song about China. China has been a place where God burdened his heart in, and as a musician himself, he sang that: "if one day he may forget China, let his right hand forget all the techniques and skills of playing. Oh God, give me the heart for China" I wasn't able to relate to him back then when i just heard the song 2 years ago. For me then, music was everything. Awake or in sleep, music and guitars dominated my whole life and praying to forget my techniques, No WAY!!!

Thanks God for this sister who reminded me this verse again. When i looked at it now, i began to understand where the psalmist was coming from...where Chuck Hong was coming from. In my previous blogs, i mentioned that music is only the mean to the end and not the end. Being able to use music to minister and bless others, this makes doing music purposeful.

I confessed that in the past, my passion for music is much more than the passion that i have for God's pple and works. Even up till now too. But i dare to say that the passion i have for God's works, is increasing gradually. Praise God.

I had a chance to talk to Manson when we were soaking up the sun in Sentosa yesterday. We agreed upon the fact that we dun want our band to be a "ra-ra" band....Making a din in the music scene and then die off....We want the band and our music to bless others; we want our concerts and our lives to impact and change lives, directing them to God.

Very funny, just nice when we were toking, some ah beng full-body with tatoos walked past us. What was funny was that, his tatooes were pictures of beheaded samurai heads. In samurai's war culture, the head of a fallen enemy samurai was the prize of the battle. The Samurai warrior could claim rewards with these heads. Anyway, my point is....If every concert i did is considered a battle, then the prize i want is the souls that are saved by God. These are my ultimate prizes.
No samurai would be silly enough to fight a battle without prizes. hee.

Recalling the previous concerts i did:
1) Override in Thailand - 388 souls saved
2) Void in Government Schools - 7 souls saved, working on 1 more.
Total 395 soul saved.

It's right to say that i should not look into figures, but this figures serve as a reminder for me on what's the purpose of me doing concerts and gigs. Yeah!!! If my music and my life can impact 1 life, it's more rewarding then selling millions of album. If my concerts be used to save 1 single souls, it's more rewarding then to hold a concerts to 100,000 strong crowd. Yeah!!! I know that Alvin who is my biggest blog fan ( i think) will agree with this after reading my blog....rite Alvin?

Indemnify
Oh yeah, last night Sara msned me and told me that she like the song:"Indemnify" written by me and alvin. She asked if it was original. Yes!!! it is.... I wrote the melody and the arrangement while Alvin, doing what he is best in, came out with the lyrics while Daniel just simply smoothen out the melody to bring out his vocal strength. Yeah!!!

I wrote this song while i was playing with A (1 5 1) and a(1 5 7) power chords on a higher string voicing. Then i went on with the progression of A, E, D...making it an A major song which is Daniel's comfortable key. Then for the bridge, creating tension is a norm....so i use a 2,4 progression (2,4 are the most unresloved chords of the key) to link it to the chorus.

For the chorus, i hit it really high, with a 5,4,1 progression, hoping that Daniel can hit it...And indeed, He pull it off well....Wow!!! Tailoring the song to suit the vocalist, is something that Tony of 7days taught me....I am glad to have such a music teacher!!!

Actually the band did a punk rock version of the song which was originally Acoustic(and sounded like Coldplay). And i like both versions. For the punk rock version, i did some chords substitutions at the chorus and it works....it sounded like Incubus....hee

Anyway, we are doing a studio recording of the songs soon....Be patient ok, will like u guys to listen to it too.. :>

Walking with Jesus, Walking all the way!!!

It's a Rainy tuesday morning as i woke up at 6 am in the morning making my way to work. On my way to work, i was recollecting what God has spoken to me about when i was strolling with Him the previous night.

The New "Sanguine" Band aka bang band
The preparation of the new band suffered a major setback on monday when Sara spoke to me about all future development must be put on hold. The reason is due to the fact that two of the leaders of the band who happened to be Stinter with Forerunner must raised support fully as priority over any other involvement in Forerunner. When the news broke to me, i was kind of expected but did not expect that it would impact the band's scheduling for gigs so much. All gigs' planning must then be put on hold.

I took all the emotions and questions i have back to my Lord last nite. I prayed and asked Him why must this happened now, since it was clear that it's His will to set up this band at start. Then He showed me the light and i began to see it all.

1) I think that this is the time when God demostrated that He is the Lord of the band. Just as we all were excited about the future prospect of the band, the songs we wrote and how this band can be used to minister to pple, He stepped in and reminded us that He is the Boss. Yeah!!! He can set us up and He can also tear us down despite how talented we are. Afterall, this is His work. I was greatly humbled by this.

2) I think this time came in aptly as we can also learn to rely on Him as a band. My vision for this band is not only a jam band, but more of a caregroup, or a group of musicians that gather to journey life together. Pretty much like Simon, Pat, Boon Yong and Tony of 7days. As a band of slightly more than a month, we had gone thru many happy times of song writing and planning, now is the time that we should stand firm together as a band to go thru difficulties together.

3) I think He is wanting me to step up in leadership in this band. As one of the oldest member in the band, it's my responsiblities to be a "big brother", an example to the younger ones....Pointing the band to walk closely to God. After learning so much from Pat and Forerunner about being a music minister, it's time i apply what i have learnt in this band. So ple pray for me.

Sincerely, i have great faith in God that He may want to use this band to do great things for Himself. Given the talents that we all uniquely possessed, and how we piece together as a team, i think this band got potential. I am glad that Alvin has agreed to step up in leadership alongside with me after i spent time talking to him and casting visions together.

Church - Staying or leaving?
Since the day i submitted my "resignation" to the church leaders to withdraw myself from the music ministry that i have co-founded, I was given alot of time to think about things. I confessed that i was abit hot-headed and rash about my decision of leaving the ministry initially. Now when i looked back, i should have seek God for more clear direction before letting my emotion take the wheel and drive.

I prayed for forgiveness and also for the direction of whether i should stay or leave and join another church which i can grow in. Then God began to touch me again.

1) It's not easy to leave a church tat i have grown to love for 8 years, and He has convicted my heart for this church and never once that this heart has stopped beating. I think He may want me to stay in this church

2) As for the ministry, my removal will see that it will take place just as He wants it to be. And for my future involvement with the ministry, i think i will take up a supporting role. I will not re-join the ministry, but i can offer training to the musicians both spiritual and musical using the material i have gotten from Forerunner. Also, i can help the musicians to look for opportunities outside church for developments.

Companion in life
Well, i think it's time that i seriously think of this matter of finding someone who is willing to journey life with me. Even though i may have the most beautiful wife (AT200), i still think that it's time i be serious. I have not tot of this matter seriously since i broke up with the girl that i truely loved 5 years ago. I was recovering from the wounds that she had cut deeply for a long time. I am that kind of guy that will not fall in love easily but once fallen into, i will find it hard to fall out of it. So it took me about 3 year plus to fully recovered from the fall. The past two years were very enjoyable for me, as i really enjoy my singlehood serving God, and blessing others. I developed a heart to wanting to be a blessing to the people around me. I enjoyed doing music and gig with Forerunner. It is the most fun time of my life. Free!!!

But as i grow older, i think it's time to settle down. So i began to pray last nite for a companion in life, i prayed for someone who is willing to journey life together, sharing all joy and suffering together, building a piece of heaven on earth, to learn to love and be loved and of cos, walk together closely with God.

Well, toking to God is something that i look forward to do at the end of each day. Like someone so in loved, that u cant wait to meet the other half....